Who needs the Hollywood Diet?

Want a sure-fire way to lose a few pounds and get a flatter stomach?

Food poisoning.

Good times, people, good times. It hit me yesterday morning and by yesterday evening, I was for sure the Grim Reaper was going to ring the doorbell. I have never EVER felt so sick in my entire life.

Want to double your pleasure?

My husband and I both had it. We were both so unbelievably sick yesterday afternoon that I couldn't tell you what my four-year-old was up to for a few hours in his bedroom and the playroom. All I know is I am one very blessed Mama to have a boy that follows directions, knows how to entertain himself (safely) for a few hours, and is not much of a complainer. Bless his little heart, I would think it would have been pretty scary to see both of your parents looking so poorly, but he is a champ and was brave.

Thankfully my mom came early yesterday evening and took our boy home with her for the night. It made me a little bit sad because he's never spent a night away from both of us, but since I was feeling like crap, I got over it real quick. I honestly didn't know whether or not we were going to make it through the night without calling an ambulance, but here we are today, feeling much better and on the mend. We're both still very weak and exhausted, but thankfully, the worst seems to be over. And we can now eat Saltines!

Oh, the joy.

Soaking up the weekend.

Here is what I was up to over the weekend:



It was great scooter weather, even if it was a tad on the sweltering side yesterday. The best part for riding? No wind. (Oh, but I absolutely loathe windy days on a scooter. It completely sucks the fun out of riding.) And my scooter is only twenty-something miles away from hitting 1000 on the odometer! It's hard to believe that I could have gone that far, even if it has taken me a year or two to get to that point. Just so you know, I always, always, always wear my helmet. This picture was taken before I set off on yesterday's ride. And I try to remember to wear my 70SPF sunscreen as well. You know, I have to keep up my Snow White appearance, haha!

How did you spend your weekend?

Sweet escape

My trip this week was PERFECTION. Absolutely fantastic. Packed to the brim with the most fun you could possibly stuff into less than 48 hours.

I flew to Nashville to hang with my good friend, C, from college, and my sister-in-law, M. A couple of months ago I saw that one of my favorite singers was coming to Nashville (nowhere near where I live, by the way) and asked my dear husband if I could buy tickets and go. Sweet thing that he is, he told me to get them before they sold out and he would watch our child for a few days so I could make a trip of it. I LOVE spontaneous trips like this! Anyway, I should have known, that a couple of days with C and M couldn't be anything less than fabulous.

Here's the low-down of what we crammed into less than 48 hours:

After my flight landed, C and I went back to her apartment and watched this movie before catching some zzz's...


Tuesday morning we got up and drove to meet M for this crazy tour of Nashville...

Oh. my. goodness. These two ladies, the "Jugg Sisters", were flat out hilarious. I have never laughed so hard in my life. For over an hour and a half, they drove us around in their flamingo pink schoolbus, pointing out a few sights and giving us the "dirt" on Nashville. Everything they said was totally off-color and offensive (not normally my cup of tea), but the way their comedy act was, you just couldn't help but die laughing. I highly recommend it if you ever find yourself in Music City. (www.nashtrash.com)

After my stomach muscles finally relaxed from all that guffawing, we drove over and had the best burgers I've ever put in my mouth at Five Guys Burgers (www.fiveguys.com), where I was presented with the most fabulous birthday presents (the big day is coming this weekend) -- an iTunes gift card from C (who knows me well and my love of "mix CDs") and a gift card (from M and the whole family) to this store...

Anyone who remotely knows me knows my extreme fascination, um, who am I kidding, let's just say it, OBSESSION, with all things Anthropologie. It is a darn good thing there is no Anthropologie here in Wonderland. And yes, it is a very sad fact that the gift card lasted for a mere 30 minutes in my hot little hands before I we scurried over a couple of blocks to spend it. But hey, at least I enjoyed spending it!

The fun surprise after Anthropologie (as if life could get any better) was a trip to get a box of...

...delicious gourmet cupcakes. We bought a half-dozen of various flavors -- wedding cake, birthday cake, Boston creme, Texas milk chocolate, apple spice, and darn it if I can't remember that sixth flavor. We tried a different one every few hours to make them last. De-lish!

Dinner was in East Nashville at a hip Mexican eatery called Rose Pepper. It was beautiful weather so we sat on their outdoor patio, and we especially enjoyed our appetizer of fried avocado slices.

Finally, the climax of the trip -- the concert!!! We drove downtown to this historic venue...

(the historic Ryman Auditorium, original home to the Grand Ole Opry)
to see this ultra-cool girl perform...

Let me just tell you, KT Tunstall puts on a pretty fine concert. Since it was really a tour of her second album, I was afraid she would play less of the first album (my favorite), but such was not the case and I was pleasantly surprised to hear ALL of my favorites. Not only is she a talented singer, but she is a true musician that can play instruments and write songs, a rarity in today's day and age.

And then yesterday, my last day in Nashville, we topped off the trip with a delicious breakfast of homemade Swedish pancakes made by M (who treats me like a queen every time I visit with this breakfast since she knows how much I love them) and then a quick trip to this new place...

(myself, M and C)
Gourmet popsicles! Who would've thought?! Mine was delicious -- blueberry chocolate chip, and both C and M got kiwi, which tasted just like frozen pureed kiwis. Yum. We swung by "Music Row" where all the music publishing houses and recording studios are, saluted to RCA/Victor (where Elvis recorded) and Word Records (where C did an internship), and then it was time for me to go to the airport.

Seriously, the trip couldn't have been more fun if we tried.

I'll leave you with videos of two of my favorite KT Tunstall songs...

Love is in the air.

Ah, romance. And nothing says romance quite like walking in to the nursery after your beautiful 3-year-old child has woken up from his (very long) nap to find him completely, and I mean completely, covered in "Montezuma's revenge", if you catch my drift. Yes, not only was my child covered in poo, and the absolute worst type of poo, but his sheets, his comforter, and all of the twenty or so stuffed animals that he insists on sleeping with -- all covered in poo as well.

Not exactly what I had in mind for celebrating six years of wedded bliss, but hey, I'll take time with my two favorite boys any way I can get it, I guess. And I suppose it is just a good example of what romantic love eventually blossoms into -- a much deeper, more substantial kind of love that gets you through six years of marriage, of growing together as not only husband and wife, but as parents -- the type of love that gets you through even the pooey-est moments in life.

Happy Anniversary.

Six years ago I married this guy. It's hard to believe that it has been six whole years, but it has. Here's looking forward to a whole lifetime of anniversaries to come...

Off to the lake...

...with some of my best scooter girls. Sunshine, perfect temperatures, girlfriends -- what more could you ask for?


(image from Flickr user "mademoisellechrissie")

A few random musings.

1. My son seems to be regressing on the potty-training. In the last two days we have had four, count 'em, four episodes of needing to change clothes due to his pottying in them. This is so. not. cool. I'm about to call up Pampers and just tell them to sign us up for a 15-year supply. And my son seems to not care one single bit about sitting around in wet or dirty underwear and pants. Doesn't bother him at. all. So what is it going to take to get him to actually want to save it for the potty? That, my friends, is the million dollar question.

2. Was Simon on crack last night? Anyone else, besides me, think David Archuleta needs to GO already? Talk about your cheesy song choices, absolutely boring and predictable and exactly-the-same-every-time performances. I do think he is probably a very nice little guy, but come on, people. He needs to go. And don't hate me for watching American Idol this season. It's a new thing for me, as I am usually not a regular watcher.

3. What is up with the fashions out there this year? Anyone else feel the same as me, like there aren't a whole lot of great clothing choices in the stores right now? Seriously, this time every year, I am spending away my hard-saved money to purchase new items for my spring/summer wardrobe, but I feel like it is slim pickins this year. I keep on checking all of my favorite haunts -- Anthropologie, Fossil, Gap, Banana Republic, and J. Crew -- but I just don't seem to love much of their offerings so far. I have bought a few things already, but they are all basic staples -- white jeans, khaki and navy Bermuda shorts, plain color T's, etc. Last year I just couldn't get enough of everything at Anthropologie and by now I had already bought several pieces from there (via travels or online as we don't have an Anthropologie here in Wonderland, and a good thing too, as it is much better having temptation far away from me). Lately though, I haven't seen anything I just can't live without, and in fact, I think it has been almost 6 months since I have bought something from there! That's gotta be a record for me. I guess it is a good problem to have, right? Because it just means that my money stays tucked away safely for that much longer...

4. My son now ends his pretend phone calls, all prayers, and all books and stories with the phrase "May-men" (Amen). A little bit of cuteness does help in making up for all of the pee and poo in this house.

5. Anyone out there tired of hearing me talk about pee and poo? Yeah, me too.

6. All day today my son keeps coming up to tell me "Fireman, big no-no" as well. At least he seems to now understand the concept that pulling the fire alarm was maybe not such a great idea. He and I will be making up some little apology cards to take to his teachers and preschool director tomorrow.

7. My husband told me that my new short bob haircut makes me look like someone from the 1930's. I take that as a big compliment from him, since I love all things vintage -- music, decor, fashions, etc.

8. I just ate a whole little carton of blueberries.

Chop-chop.

Today was Beauty Shop Day. I love Beauty Shop Day (I made that name up myself) -- it comes along every 6 weeks, and I just love every little thing about it. I love the fact that I am all by myself (childless) when I go to my appointments, I love the fact that it is an hour or two worth of great conversation with lots of ladies, time to catch up on all the magazines I don't get at home, and simply time to unwind just for me. Yep, I love Beauty Shop Day.

And today was even better than normal because I stepped a little outside of my normal box. I've had the same haircut for quite a few years now -- sometimes long, sometimes shoulder-length, but basically always the same style, so I finally made a change, just in time for summer. A good 3 or 4 inches came off, and it feels so much better...
Typing this post totally makes me want to go watch "Beauty Shop" with Queen Latifah or "Legally Blonde", both great beauty shop movies. Or go eat lunch at the Beauty Shop restaurant in Memphis, where you can enjoy a swanky lunch in the old beauty shop where Priscilla Presley had her famous wedding hairdo plastered on top of her head. (Yep, I've done that. The lunch thing, not the beehive hairdo plastered on top of my head.)

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Ah, Cinco de Mayo -- a great day to celebrate all things south-of-the-border, as well as a day that marks my brother and sister-in-law's 7th wedding anniversary and the 7th birthday of one of my nephews as well. My beloved son and I took a little road trip about 120 miles west to have a little three-year-old style Cinco de Mayo fiesta of our own with my sister-in-law and two of my nephews (not the ones celebrating a birthday). She bought a little pinata (I have NO idea how to type the "n" properly on here, you know, with the squiggly sign over it, so you'll just have to imagine it) and hung it from the tree for the boys to swing at. I'm sure you can picture it in your head -- two three-year-olds each armed with a fat plastic bat, just a disaster waiting to happen! Fortunately no three-year-olds were harmed during this little fiesta, and, after downing some hard-earned Smarties and Tootsie Roll Pops, we went to our favorite Mexican food restaurant in their area and ate our weight (and then some) in chips, salsa, queso, tortillas, sour cream chicken enchiladas, and fish tacos. Who doesn't love Cinco de Mayo? This gringa sure does!

Obviously our Monday got off to a great start. We also enjoyed a pretty great weekend as well, hanging with our boy, our five pooches, and just enjoying the sunshine.

We also have a new rule at our house for the boy -- whenever he is in the backyard, he is required to wear a lifevest. We have a swimming pool in the backyard, and we have gone round and round trying to figure out a way to fence around the pool. Our backyard is fenced, but the area around the pool is not. Unfortunately though, it really is in a bizarre spot in the backyard, and there really seems to be no good way to fence it in further. So my cousin's wife told me that she had heard of a family that had a similar problem and had their children wear lifevests at all times while in the backyard. I think it is brilliant!
Anyway, long story short, don't you just love the plumber's crack?!

For the first time in a very long time we also hired a babysitter so we could get out and see a movie ("Iron Man" -- I highly recommend it). I saw a second movie Sunday afternoon with my girlfriends ("Made of Honor" -- cute, predictable, funny, but I could have done without some of the jokes, hence the PG-13 rating). My mom and I also got a little drive in on Saturday to go visit a little quilt shop she had read an article about. It was about a forty minute drive from my house to get there, but it felt so nice to get out a little bit in the country on such a gorgeous afternoon. The quilt shop was in a newly built log cabin that they built from scratch with no plans whatsoever (pretty impressive in my book).
And how cute is my "brown paper package tied up with string"? I bought a pattern I had been eyeing on the Internet already, and some orange fabrics to get started on the pattern, and three very cute reproduction feedsack patterns for fun as well. When she wrapped up my purchases in the brown paper, well, that was just the icing on the cake! (Not to mention I had "My Favorite Things" stuck in my head the rest of the day.)Down the lane from the quilt shop was the most adorable house I have seen in this whole area, and I was kicking myself that I didn't take my camera to get a picture of it. It was so quirky and cute that it truly looked like Snow White could have walked right out the front door to greet us. I definitely will be making my way back down there just to get a photo. You've got to see it!

The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad....

...afternoon.

Let me just say, yesterday afternoon was a doozy. It started out in a somewhat unfortunately predictable way -- I walked in my son's room to get him after his nap and smelled the all too familiar scent of poo-in-the-pants. Ugh. Seriously, if my son is fully potty-trained by the time he turns eighteen, it will be a miracle. Anyway, this episode of poo-in-the-pants turned all too ugly when I was peeling his clothes off of him and the poo not only got on my newly cleaned tile bathroom floor but also on my hands. (Insert high-pitched girl squeals here.) I normally am very skilled at taking care of the poo clothing without having to ever have it touch me, but I guess my skills left me high and dry yesterday afternoon. So. incredibly. gross. Not to mention the fact that yesterday was house-cleaning day and, up until that point, my house had that fantastic just-been-cleaned smell, one that never seems to last long enough for my liking, and that was definitely cut way too short yesterday. My house was all at once left reeking of little boy poo.

Regardless, I did my best, took care of the situation, gave my boy a bath, and continued with my afternoon of getting things done. We had a fun event to go to last night, so I needed to make an appetizer to take. I got that done, got my boy all dressed (again), myself fixed up, and started to get nervous. You see, I had dropped our golden retriever off at a dog groomer's at 1:30 to get her annual cut for the summer. Since I am not a regular customer, I asked them how long it might take, and they told me it would probably be 5 or 5:30 at the latest that they would be done. Perfect, I thought, since I had to be back at my house by 6pm to leave for the event.

5:00 came and went. 5:30 came and went. Around 5:35pm, I decided I'd better call to see how things were going. And let me just say, I did so in a very non-pushy, ultra-nice way. The lady on the other end of the phone call? Not so nice. Apparently they had just gotten my baby in for a bath and had not even STARTED on the cut, and the lady told me that she would probably not be done for another HOUR. I politely told the lady that I had needed to be leaving my house at 6pm for something, and I didn't know that it would be so late that she would be ready. The lady then promptly, and in a not-so-nice tone of voice, told me that I should have told them if I needed an "early pick-up". I even offered at that point to come and get her and take her home, but that was not an option considering the dog was dripping wet and not even cut.

So I had to call and cancel getting to attend the fun event. At 6:20 I got the call that my dog was finished. When I got there to pick her up, I noticed on the door that the shop's hours were posted -- closing at 5:30 every day. So I wasn't crazy after all. They were there with my dog an hour past closing time. To top it all off, the bill was for $70. Good grief. I mean, she is a golden retriever, so I had expected to pay around $50 which is what we have paid in the past, but $70? She is not a large dog by any means -- she was the runt of the litter and much much smaller than most golden retrievers. You live and you learn.

Top the evening off with my son refusing to eat much of what I made for dinner, something that rarely happens as he is always a healthy eater, followed by my son's behavior turning horribly wrong, causing me to put him to bed early lest I go absolutely insane from his 3-year-old antics, and then a lovely evening of severe storms in our area until almost 3 in the morning, and you have my afternoon.

It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad afternoon.

As the mother in the book says though,
"some days are like that. Even in Australia."

(Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Vorst was one of my absolute favorite books growing up and is now a favorite of my son's as well.)

Let's get physical, physical...

(I know there is no way on God's green earth that you could possibly read that title without Olivia Newton John's voice popping into your head. And if you are like me, you just might have that song stuck in your pretty little head the rest of the night.)

It's time for a monthly treadmill update, basically just to inform you, my faithful readers, all SIX of you (really, my popularity is gaining, I do believe, hahaha), will hopefully keep me accountable in my pursuit of slimmer thighs and a tighter caboose.

(Drumroll, please...)
This month's total comes in at 62.3 miles walked on the treadmill. I pretty much averaged between 4-5 nights a week walking 3-5 miles a day, give or take some short stretches of time where I ever-so-briefly fell off the wagon, thankfully eventually finding my way back to the basement. I walk about an hour a night, give or take a few minutes, and currently I am up to a speed of 4.3 miles per hour.

I also thought it would be a good idea at the beginning of this endeavor to take some measurements of the lower extremities of what-God-gave-me, which led me to strip down to my skivvies tonight and remeasure, hoping and praying that the measurements went down. Now, of course, I am not stupid enough to post these measurements on here (who wants to do that?!), but I can, however, tell you the loss so far. If I measured correctly (which is a little blurry at this point, trying to remember how much exactly did I suck in my gut the first time to keep the numbers down) I think I lost a total of around 2" so far, 1" from my waist (at my bellybutton) and 1" from my gludious maximus. Regardless, I thought the measurements idea sounded a whole lot more rewarding than stepping on the scale because we all know that burning calories all-the-while strengthening muscles can sometimes lead to weight gain (from the muscle) or at least no weight loss in the first month or two, and man, that is just sad, to walk 62+ miles and see no change on the scale. Cruel, really. Now, I cannot lie, I have gotten on my bathroom scale a time or two, and if I were to guess, I think I have lost 2-3 pounds so far as well. But I am learning that my goal shouldn't necessarily be weight loss, especially since I am in the normal range for my height, albeit the most I have ever weighed in my life, because really what matters is getting rid of some of the junk-in-my-trunk and getting back to the slimmer thighs I once knew. My ghetto-booty? (And let me add, that is my own "pet name" for my butt, and not given to me by anyone else.) It is probably always going to be somewhat the same shape because that is what the good Lord gave me, but it does seem to be firming up as well.

Sorry if that was more info than any of you wanted to ever know about me, but, folks, I am just keepin' it real. And it's up to you, all six of you, haha, to tune in next month to see if I am still keepin' it real.

15 days.

Ooh, that's bad. Yep, it has been 15 whole days since I last posted. Oops.

To tell you the truth, it has been a busy 15 days though, so I at least have good excuses. There were many little birthday parties attended, and there was one big birthday bash to throw for my handsome little man, who is now the ripe old age of three. Whew.

So I figure I could make a list of what I have been doing the last 15 days via my favorite way to list, bullets!

*I spent all of my days as a full-time mama. (Yes, this is what I am always doing, but it deserves to be part of the list since it still takes up most of my time.)
*I made and sent out my doll quilt for the Doll Quilt Swap III.
*I received my AWESOME quilt for Doll Quilt Swap III (pictures to come tomorrow).
*I attended three birthday parties for three little boys turning three (including my son).
*I rode over 100 miles on my scooter -- go me!
*I did a little tickling of the ivories for the children's choir I accompany.
*I walked on the treadmill. (Nope, haven't fallen off the wagon yet.)
*I cooked dinner for my family several times, and anyone that knows me personally knows this is a very big accomplishment indeed.
*That having been said, I provided for my family by way of McDonald's several times, even though I have watched the movie "SuperSize Me" and should have learned from it.
*I learned a valuable lesson in buying a birthday cake from a bakery -- if they say it will feed 30-40 people, it probably will not, unless you want the pieces of cake to be perfectly sized for your Barbie dolls (um, not that I have any Barbie dolls -- my mom never bought me any as a child, but that is a story for another day...)
*I watched a cute movie, "I'm Reed Fish", via Netflix, mainly chosen for the actress in it, my beloved Gilmore Girl, Alexis Bledel.
*I successfully pulled off a Sesame Street themed birthday party for my son, complete with messy decoupage glued treasure boxes as the craft for 12 kiddos.
*I ate gelato twice, and you'd better believe I will definitely be eating more of it now that there is a gelato-establishment less than two miles from my house.
*I hung out with two of my dearest friends from college the whole weekend.
*I got a much needed spa pedicure.
*I voted for my favorite American Idol for the first time this season (go David Cook!), which totally made me feel like a teenager, pushing redial over and over on the phone until I got through. Totally.
*And, last but not least, I continued to wash out more little boy underwear full of poo, but at least I am coming to terms with it.

More picture-filled posts to come this week -- I at least wanted to let everyone (all three of you) know that I am still alive and kickin'...