A woman's got needs.

I've done this before, but it's a fun one, and this time there were different answers that came up. You know how it works -- you paste the phrase using your name into the search box and see what pops up. Annie tagged me, so here you go!

Valerie needs:

1. Valerie needs "plenty of exercise, including a brisk daily walk". Has someone been spying on my junk in the trunk lately?

2. Valerie needs "to be in a home with no children". THIS ONE HAS GOT TO BE MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE. Forever and ever, amen. Obviously it is in reference to an animal that needs a home, but YES, there is many a day I may feel like I need to be in a home with NO CHILDREN...

3. Valerie needs "music more than food, air and water". No joke. Okay, now I'm starting to feel like I have a stalker out there...

4. Valerie needs "mental help". If you're not out there guffawing by now, I'd be surprised.

5. Valerie needs "to be patient and thankful for as long as it takes". Can I get another amen?

6. Valerie needs "to grow. She is approximately the same size she was in second grade." Har-dee-har-har. Let's stop with the short jokes, alright?

7. Valerie needs "her money no later than June". Yeah, people, send those payments in! Mama's got some Anthropologie she needs to buy!

8. Valerie needs "a ratings boost". Ha. Have my numbers gone down?

9. Valerie needs "to get to the top of the town water tower before she's gunned down by the workers of handover ranch". And you thought you had problems.

10. Valerie needs "to be the CIA Director for the next administration". Finally, somebody out there recognizes my worth.

Okay, folks, back to work, back to work. Nothin' more to see here.